Tuesday, June 13, 2006

Friendship

I've never looked down on friendship. And I have never taken my friendship for granted by any mean. Recently, there are some incidents, good and bad included, go through my life which I like to share. And they somehow change the way I feel about friendship in a very positive way.

The first story is about love.
A friend of mine recently broke up with her partner. This is beyond her what she could expect and of course she is so heart broken. So for a while her friends take her go out and keep her company. We go out for lunch and dinner every weekend. We take self-improvement classes every week. Her friends know that this is the time a person need to be surrounded by words of understanding and encouragement and they are there for her. What I learn in this story is that when the love one leaves you behind you have nothing to loose but good friends. Good friends that will care for your lost and they will set aside their personal time to come comforting you. Love could come and go people, but friendship remains the same. And to my dear friend I could not refrain from tendering to her the consolation that may be found among us.

My second story is about death.
My best friend from middle school was diagnosed with bone cancer 7 years ago. He went though all sort of possible treatment - from surgery to chemotherapy to amputate one of his leg finally. During the first month after getting the bad news about the arrant disease, he was depressed and afraid of dying. Friends came to talk and comfort him, encourage him to fight against the disease instead of giving up. He did listen and go through those treatments mentioned above. But my friend was finally sent home to wait for his death because cancer cells had already spread all over. I still remember that he was calm and brave after all. He called me up one day and we had a conversation about God, what he believed in God and what he believe he would go after death. He also told me that he was spending most of his remaining time to read the bible and pray for his poor mom and dad. I remember what he said was one wanted to die. Even people who wanted to go to heaven didn't want to die to get there. And yet death was the destination we all share. No one had ever escaped it. And that was as it should be, because Death was very likely the single best invention of Life. It was Life's change agent. It cleared out the old to make way for the new. Hah, sorry to be such dramatic but it's quiet true.
He died in 2001 leaving a will thanking all the friends who had come to comfort him. His mom is now living in CA and I often come to stay with her and her husband now and then. They both treat me like their late only son.

My last story is about making the connection.
Couple of years of ago, I knew this friend from college. We started studying in a assigned group project originally. Because of my programming skill and the dedication I had for the project, he asked that we should keep in touch and take class together. Later on that year, I took several classes with him. As far as I knew, he was working full-time and going to school partime to refresh his knowledge. So knowing this friend for two years and I didn't have a clue where he worked or what his job was. I think partly because of his down-to-earth personality. As the last semester approached I asked him if he knew anybody hiring because I'd like to have an internship before getting out of college. He said just give him my resume and he would take care of it. And I found out that he is a VP of PROS Revenue management - the world's leader in optimizing revenue software development products. And of course I was hired (after the 6-hour long interrogated interview) and being trusted in the company.

Guess it must be time for bed because I was uttering this kind of gibberish from my mouth and I don't even know what I was talking about anymore. :-)

My Old Friend - Tim McGraw

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

I want to thank all my friends who have supported me, loved me unconditionally even when I wasn't so lovable at times, cared for me and encouraged me. My life would be so miserable without you. You all listen to me, keep me company, let me cry over your shoulders, watch me get so stupid drunk, go to the opera with me, hang out at Barnes & Noble with me and many many more. I don't know how I can ever repay my friends for their patience and love. I thank God everyday for all the friends that I have. You guys are the best! From the bottom of my heart, I LOVE YOU GUYS SO MUCH!!!

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Anonymous said...

Doug, how come your friends are so childish?

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